Pressing on

I've been hearing from various people and sources about pressing on in my Christian walk lately. On the radio, in songs, from pastors, teachers, in books... I've been hearing a lot about it lately. And whenever something is repeated in my life, I feel that God might be trying to drive home a point, so I try to pay special attention.

Today I heard a sermon in which the preacher said that holiness is something we'll never attain. We have to keep striving towards it. My first reaction was, "wow, that's so discouraging!" to think that in 40/50 years I will still be so lacking. That just sounds so hard! It sounds like so much work! I'm supposed to work all my life on something that in comparison to the pure and perfect standard God has given us, will never measure up?

The preacher talked about it being a sweet reward, but we don't see it. We're unable to make that connection. The ability to see that reward and to really esteem it for what it is eludes most of us.

I've recently received a strong boost from the Holy Spirit, a newfound drive to pursue God and holiness. I have to admit that I'm really surprised at what's taken place. The purity I've seen and experienced has become a motivator itself. Purity has become attractive to me and makes me seek purity itself even more. I enjoy purity. I enjoy rejecting sinful thoughts. I enjoy the battle. I enjoy victory.

I looked back and reflected today and when I realized that there were some thoughts that I no longer think, thoughts I never thought I'd be rid of, I feel a tremendous peace, a deep joy, thankfulness. There is peace just from being on the journey. The journey gives me an inner confidence and joy. The journey and struggle is an enjoyable one. I'm sure there will be times when temptation won't feel so joyful, but right now, I can see how perseverance and striving towards purity is so attractive.

I want to carry the banner! I want to tell the world about this! I never thought there would be victory, but there is! In this sinful world I want to stand up and shout about the awesome holiness of God that he desires to share with us. How sweet his purity is! How enjoyable! I will not defile my mind! I will reject sinful thoughts that try to creep in! I will acknowledge Biblical Truth over what my lying heart wants to tell me! Who else is with me??

This is ridiculous! It's ridiculous that a guy like me could feel this way. I remember several years ago when Jarrod called me from downstairs to pick me up for Bible Study. I was so annoyed. I had forgotten about Bible Study, and it was the last thing I wanted to do. I hated it. I was so annoyed by him. I remember doing anything to pass the time during sermons. Counting tiles. Daydreaming. Anything!

But now I love God's word. I love talking with him. I love doing what pleases him. I know that changing me pleases him. It's amazing to know that almighty God, my Jesus, is actively involved in my life and cares enough to deal with my filth and my ugly ugly sin. God loves giving me a spiritual makeover.

Do you really think that I'm any different from you? Don't you realize how much I hated this? If I can be turned around, you can too! But are you willing?

Surely you don't have the strength in you. Neither did I. God wants to do the work. And I believe that he's extending that opportunity to you now.

I've experienced so much failure in my life. I still fail, and I know I will fail again. But never mind that, I have to press on!

I have to tell you and plead with you to understand that I'm woefully immature. I feel like I'm barely getting started. And seeing how this is a new development, I really am just getting started. I can see my life changing. I can feel it. I'm not the person I was two months ago. Everything is happening so quickly. I'm being swept away.

This is not a fight where emotions will be my strength and motivation. But I sure am glad that it can be a byproduct.

It's 4am, and I have to stop. But I just couldn't wait until tomorrow. Sometimes things happen in the night and I just have to write it down. Here's a video that's been on my mind that talks about pressing on. (I didn't understand the video for the longest time. It doesn't seem to have anything to do with the song. And I know it's not the official video. Some guy just decided to make it and post it on youtube. But now I can see how the editor was trying to match footage with what the song is saying.)